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Sunday, February 2, 2014

My 600 Pound Life

Yesterday I had the day to myself.  The boys were with Scouts, CME was working and the dogs were satisfied as long as they had food, water and were let outside when needed.  I was up at 5am to get the boys where they needed to be, and I am (slightly) ashamed to admit that I had drank an entire pot of coffee before 9:00am!  Yikes!  However, I will claim this victory:  the boys wanted donuts for breakfast and my absolute favorite was even advertised on the Donut Bank billboard:  Chocolate Cream Filled Long John!  I will have you know that I brought CME a danish home, but I did not cave to this weakness!  Go God!

Anyway, after a lovely couple of hours spent with a dear friend of mine, I was home for the night.  I found myself flipping through channels on the TV.  Note - I don't watch that much TV, so I didn't really have any idea what I was looking for.  I'd stop on various channels and watch a few minutes and decide that nope...this show wasn't for me.  Until...until I landed on TLC.

What caught my attention?  The morbidly obese lady talking about her upcoming weight loss surgery.  I was hooked.  As I watched, I could relate to some of her words.  Her fear of possibly dying from the surgery and leaving her 9 year old daughter without her mom; the thoughts of what life would be like after surgery, etc.  She had a lot of really positive things to say about why she was having surgery and how she wanted to be a participant in her daughter's life/activities, not just a bystander.  (my paraphrase from my own emotions) What I couldn't relate to was what a complete and utter jerk her husband was toward her.  He told her that if she lost weight, that not only would she not be attractive to him, she'd be repulsive.  WHAT?  I started getting angry for her.  He didn't go to the hospital for her surgery, though he did call her the day after. When she said, "Hello" he replied, "So how much weight have you lost?" and then proceeded to tell her what he was eating.  She was smart and ended the call, but again...I was angry!  When he came to take her home (he was late) he decided to go through a drive-through (after she was with him) and order fast food and then asked her hold his burger for him.  I was angry!  (I probably would have thrown it out the window...) When she asked him (a few months later) to pick up a salad for her for dinner, he told her if she wanted to eat grass...to go outside.  I was ANGRY!  When she hired a personal trainer, he told her it was a waste of money and if she wanted to break a sweat she could vacuum the house.  I. WAS. ANGRY!!!!  I think it was around month 6 that she stopped at the golden arches for a Large Diet Dr. Pepper.  I gasped...audibly!

Seriously...as I continued watching my heart broke for Zsalynn Whitworth.  This journey is hard.  It's even harder if you don't have a support network.  Not only does this woman not have a support network (at least not one they were showing), she has a husband who is doing everything in his power to sabotage her health...physically and emotionally.  It's abuse and I pray she sees that.  Sure, I don't know what kind of counseling there might have been before/during/after the procedure.  Reality TV is usually not reality - at least not fully as the situation truly happened; editing teams have a LOT of control.  Regardless, even what was shown there is a whole slew of issues this lady is facing.

My prayer for her is that she find some good deep Christian counseling.  Her words make it clear that she truly does want a healthy life.  She wants to be around for her daughter.  My fear is that she is not going to be successful long-term because of her life situation.  I pray for a breakthrough in her marriage.  I pray for her to be surrounded by love and support!

Let me put this out there for anyone who may be contemplating this surgery.  Find a support system!!  If it's not your spouse, find family...friends...peers.  Dig deep into faith in your Creator.  When no one else is available...He will listen.  He will get you through the dark times.  His is forever faithful.  He created you...He knows your heart, your every thought.  He knows who He created you to be!  Let Him in and let Him heal you!!
"I praise you [God] because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." ~Psalm 139:14