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Friday, January 20, 2012

It's Official...I'm Insane.

"Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results."  ~ [not] Albert Einstien

By that "definition" I. am. insane.

I've been logging my food intake this week and realized today that I have already fallen back into the pattern of behavior that helped me "fail" all the other attempts at losing weight.  I have not made small sustainable changes.  I did it like I've always done it.  I wrote it down.  I didn't pay attention to the labels.  I didn't weigh/measure/count with any accuracy at all.  And though I like the app for my phone, I'm still guessing at some of nutritional value.  The app did help me realize that even if I were "dieting" I am not getting enough calories in a day (making me feel famished at night), but am averaging high on carbs, average on fats, and way (WAY) low on protein.  I know it's early in this, and I'm glad that I am already seeing the careless pattern, but yeesh!  I'm not sure I know how to make small sustainable changes.  

I recognized a "trigger" situation (oh gosh, I can't believe I'm about to admit this publicly!!): I am BAD about eating when under stress (work stuff) when no one is around.  I found myself rummaging through my cabinets and fridge multiple times the other night.  Yes, I was hungry (results of not getting in all the calories I should), and yes I chose "wisely"(?), comparatively speaking, when I did finally make up my mind.  But I can't tell you how many different foods I picked up and put back before I decided on a bowl of cereal - and by bowl, I mean I don't know how much I had...because why?  I don't measure!  Since I can't avoid the trigger of being under stress AND being home alone some nights, I've got to figure out another way to deal with it.  A dear friend of mine sent me an encouraging email today about losing the 17# - it said  "pray when you're hungry."  I'm going to do that!  But I don't want to pray for me.  I want to pray for those who are hungry on a daily/weekly basis. Hopefully that will help me deal with that trigger.  (Thanks, friend, for that idea!!!)

So what have I learned from 4 days of journaling my food intake?

  • I need a food scale.
  • I need to follow my checklist more closely.  Especially: plan ahead and read food labels.
  • I am not getting in all my water.  I'm sure that is another reason to cut back on coffee.
  • I am not on a diet.  I need to figure out what small sustainable changes look like for me.

The first few days of this new routine haven't been the easiest.  Lots of "life" happening that can get in the way.  However, I ran across this Scripture that encouraged me to continue seeking and working on the changes.  I love how His Word feeds me!!!  :)

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. ~ Hebrews 12:11


"I praise you [God] because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." ~Psalm 139:14

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