Reflections

As part of bariatric center's program, we are required to attend a monthly support group for the first year after surgery.  We're welcome to attend indefinitely, but it's highly recommended (because can they really make me go?) for the first year.

Last week was a good one for me.  We spent time reflecting on the past year, looking at where we are now and identifying goals for long-term success.  As we wrote down our answers and began sharing with one another, I realized that I was the only one that did not mention a weight number...neither amount lost to date or a goal number.  I found that interesting as much as I've complained about the weight seemingly to come off slowly - but I really think it was an subconscious response that the number doesn't matter and that I am truly getting healthy - body and mind!

So here are my responses:

Looking back...what motivated you to change?
* Not being able to do active things with my boys.
* Being on a mission trip and realizing that I couldn't do what God had sent me to do.
* Tired of being in constant pain and tired of being tired all the time.

List your positive achievements: (this is where most people put a weight loss number)
* Participating in 5K walks (Thanks M!)
* Exercising on my own
* Climbing a tree!
* Hubby being able to pick me up with those great bear hugs!
(I could have put more, but I suppose these were my "top" feel goods!)

What are your goals regarding achievements, personal growth and maintenance?
* To continue self-discipline when it comes to both eating and exercising
* To change the "I Can't" mentality to "I Don't"
* Growth - continuing to hear and accept the fact that God created me and that I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
I think all of those will make future achievements and long-term maintenance much easier!

It was about this time last year when I really started considering surgery.  It was a scary thought.  The time during the informational meeting was extremely emotional for me.  It actually left me in tears and unable to even talk to CME about what was going through my head.  It was a journey that I still wasn't sure about.  It was one that I feared, to be honest.  Not the surgery itself, necessarily, but everything that went along with it.  Would I really be able to do this?  Would I ever be able to eat <insert food here> again?  What if it didn't work for me?  What if...?  Truly, the answer is no - I couldn't do this...not on my own.  It was through courage and strength from God that I was able to make this decision.  It has been through the loving support of my family and friends whom God has placed in my life that have made this side of the surgery so precious.  And it is only by His grace that I am able to write about this journey and where it's taking me.  I am one blessed lady!
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"I praise you [God] because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." ~Psalm 139:14